When your mind won’t stop spinning—start with your body

Remember last week when we talked about catastrophizing? Another term for it is rumination - that loop where your mind keeps replaying the same worries, analyzing every angle, hoping one more thought will bring peace.

We’ve all been there.

You have been hearing me (for a long time!) talk about self-talk and mindset as the "cure" for this. I have written many, many emails to you about reframing situations into something helpful and constructive. I have talked and talked about mindset and embodying values at your core.

I still believe in that work.

I will still teach self-talk and mindset.

But . . . in the moment . . . the mind alone can't always get you out of that crazy, negative, panicky, thought spiral. If your body is in fight-or-flight mode, your brain is flooded with stress hormones: adrenaline, cortisol—and it’s basically hearing, “We’re not safe right now.” The body can’t relax just because you told it to.

Most of you are parents (and if you're not, picture a niece or nephew). When young children are in the throes of a tantrum, does talking work? Does explaining things to them calm them down?

NO!

That’s where a “body first” approach comes in. Before we coach your mindset, we regulate your nervous system—so your body gets the message that you actually are safe. Once that happens, your thoughts naturally quiet down.

Here are a few super simple ways to calm your system in the moment:

• Exhale longer than you inhale. Try breathing in for 4 counts, out for 6. The long exhale tells your vagus nerve (your body’s “rest and digest” switch) that you’re safe.

  
  

• Ground through your senses. Name what you can see, touch, hear, smell, and taste—it brings your awareness back to now.

  
  

• Move the energy through. Shake your hands, roll your shoulders, or walk. Motion helps complete the stress cycle.

  
  

• Bilateral movement. Walking, gentle tapping from left to right, or crossing your midline helps both sides of your brain reconnect, signaling to your system that it’s safe to relax.

  
  

• Soften the body, don’t command the mind. Drop your jaw, release your shoulders, unclench your stomach.

  
  

• Cold water reset. Splash your face or hold something cool to your cheeks — it’s nature’s off-switch for stress.

When your body shifts out of threat mode, your mind follows. From that calmer place, the self-talk and mindset work you already know how to do become 10x more effective. Because you’re no longer coaching yourself from panic, you’re coaching from peace.

Journal Prompts:

• What is my body feeling in this moment? (tight chest, shallow breath, tension, etc.)

• If my nervous system is activated, what might it think I need protection from?

• What evidence supports my fear? What evidence doesn’t?

• What else could be true?

• If I were calm, how might I see this differently?

• What would “body first” look like for me right now?

• What usually helps me feel safe or grounded?

Affirmations:

• I can calm my body before solving the problem.

• Not every thought deserves my attention.

• My nervous system is trying to protect me, not hurt me.

• Calm body, clearer mind.

• I can return to the present moment.

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Office Hours:  This month Office Hours are on Wednesday, April 22. This is for Editor's Circle Coaching Members as well as any Guided Revision Coaching Members who would like to touch base between scheduled coaching appointments. HERE is the link to schedule a 30-minute slot

The Weekly Draft: happens every Sunday evening at 7pm at this link. Come prepared to reflect on the past week and draft the upcoming week. It is meant to be a heads down, co-planning time, with me being available to share strategies and/or answer questions. Join me HERE