When Our Minds Jump to the Worst (and How to Gently Edit the Story)

The other day I sent an email and didn’t hear back. A few hours passed . . . then a full day.

And just like that, my brain got busy imagining the worst.

Maybe they didn’t like the idea. Maybe I said something wrong. Maybe they’re upset with me. Maybe the whole thing is falling apart.

By the time I checked my inbox again, I had written an entire dramatic storyline—complete with rejection, disappointment, and future failure.

Of course, when they finally replied, it was simple: “Sorry for the delay—busy day. Looks great.”

Nothing had gone wrong. Except the story I made up in my head.

This is catastrophizing—our mind’s tendency to jump straight to the worst-case scenario. It happens fast, quietly, and often feels like truth.

Psychologist Martin Seligman explains that when we fall into pessimistic thinking, we tend to interpret situations in three ways:

Personal — We make it about us

“They didn’t respond because I messed up.”

Pervasive — We assume it affects everything

“This is going to ruin the whole opportunity.”

Permanent — We believe it will last forever

“This always happens to me.”

When our thinking becomes personal, pervasive, and permanent, even small moments can feel heavy and final. A delayed response becomes rejection. A mistake becomes identity. A setback becomes destiny.

But here’s the powerful part:

If our minds have the capacity to imagine the worst . . . they also have the capacity to imagine the best.

We can practice editing the story.

Maybe they’re just busy. Maybe this is one small moment in a bigger picture. Maybe this will work out even better than I expected. Maybe I don’t have enough information yet.

This isn’t about forced positivity or pretending everything is perfect. It’s about widening the lens. Giving ourselves more than one possible explanation. Creating space for possibility.

When you notice yourself jumping to the worst this week, pause and ask:

• Am I making this personal?

• Am I assuming this affects everything?

• Am I deciding this is permanent?

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Then try drafting an alternative:

What’s another explanation? What if this turns out okay? What if this is just one moment, not the whole story?

Your mind is creative. It can write fear. It can also write hope.

And the more we practice, the easier it becomes to draft a story that leaves room for resilience, flexibility, and possibility.

Journal Prompts:

• What situation recently caused me to jump to the worst conclusion? What story did I tell myself?

• What facts do I actually know? What parts did my mind fill in?

• Am I making this personal? What else could explain this that has nothing to do with me?

• Am I assuming this is pervasive? What parts of my life are actually still going well?

• Am I treating this as permanent? What evidence do I have that this is temporary?

• If a friend were in this situation, what would I tell them?

• What is a neutral explanation? A hopeful explanation? A generous explanation?

Affirmations:

• I notice my thoughts without automatically believing them.

• Not every thought is a prediction.

• I can hold multiple possibilities at once.

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Office Hours:  There are no more office hours in March. This is for Editor's Circle Coaching Members as well as any Guided Revision Coaching Members who would like to touch base between scheduled coaching appointments. HERE is the link to schedule a 30-minute slot

The Weekly Draft: happens every Sunday evening at 7pm at this link. Come prepared to reflect on the past week and draft the upcoming week. It is meant to be a heads down, co-planning time, with me being available to share strategies and/or answer questions. Join me HERE