How much time do you spend thinking about things that you don't actually know? You worry about how someone might react. You obsess over what someone might say. You project an event in your mind that might never happen. We treat imagined situations like they are already true. We think we know what others are thinking, and we spend so much of our time imagining how we might react to their words or actions (that may or may not ever happen). Does this sound familiar? I know I hav

I've been in a long season of revision. Basically, right now is a culmination of several years of transition coming to a close. You know when people announce on social media that they are now "Ashley 2.0"? Yeah, I feel like Candice 4.0 at this point. So it seems like a good time for my business to evolve just a bit. Not a new business, or a radical change, but an edited version. Even though sometimes it may feel like it, you're never really starting from a blank page. Sure, s

Why can't I just do the thing? Whether it's a new exercise program, waking up early, weekly meal planning, taking vitamins . . . you get the idea. Starting a new habit is just hard! Even if we know it's good for us. Even if we know we will feel great when we complete it. Even if we go to bed the night before, setting the early alarm with the intention of waking up to start our miracle morning. I have a few theories as to why it's so hard to start a new habit. Our nervous syst

I know, I know, it's only mid-July. But with how fast this summer seems to be flying by, I'm starting to become wistful for Fall. While I do enjoy the long, hot days of summer - the lounging by the ocean with a good book, the walks in the morning before it gets too hot - I really, really love Fall. OK, so I'm done waxing poetic about the autumnal season. What I really want to share about today is my love of Gilmore Girls. Fall and Gilmore Girls just go together (if you know,

Have you ever found yourself experiencing seemingly conflicting emotions? When they seem to fluctuate several times throughout the day. It can be confusing at times. It makes you question how you really feel. But I have come to realize this . . . Two things can be true. Especially during particularly emotional times like transitions, we naturally feel a wide range of emotions and think any number of seemingly opposite thoughts about our situation. Because we are in between. S

I've been experiencing a lot of seemingly conflicting emotions lately. They seem to fluctuate several times throughout the day. It can be confusing at times. It makes me question how I really feel. But now more than ever, I have come to realize that this . . . Two things can be true. Especially during particularly emotional times like transitions, we naturally feel a wide range of emotions and think any number of seemingly opposite thoughts about our situation. Because we are

What is your tolerance for uncertainty? I recently read something that stopped me cold—your level of anxiety is directly related to your ability to handle uncertainty. To sit with the unknown. That landed hard. Because if I'm honest, I've spent a good chunk of my life trying to outthink the future. Planning for every scenario. Trying to feel ready before I took the leap. But here's what I've learned: the certainty we're waiting for rarely shows up. And while we're waiting, li

I come across a lot of confusion about optimism. We've been taught that optimism means looking on the bright side. Finding the silver lining. Believing that everything happens for a reason. Insisting that "it'll all work out." But that's not the kind of optimism I believe in. Some things are simply awful. We all experience seasons of grief, disappointment, heartbreak, illness, uncertainty, and loss. There are moments that knock the wind out of us. Moments we would never choos

There is something about summer that awakens a different part of us. The smell of sunscreen. Fireflies blinking in the dusk. Ice cream dripping down your hand. Staying outside a little longer because the sun hasn't set yet. Music with the windows down. Fresh peaches from the farmer's market. Reading on the porch while the laundry waits. As children, summer often represented freedom. Play. Possibility. A break from routine. As adults, many of us lose that. We become experts at

Hello friends, Have you noticed that June feels different? The days are longer. The weather is warmer. Vacations start appearing on the calendar. Kids are home from school. Routines become a little less routine. Even if your schedule hasn't changed much, there's often a shift in energy this time of year. And yet many of us are still carrying expectations from January. We want to stay productive. We want to make progress on our goals. We want to keep moving forward. At the sam

Happy almost June. Remember way back in January (that somehow simultaneously feels like yesterday and ten years ago!) when we set our 2026 goals? On Monday, we'll turn the page to a new month and, somehow, find ourselves nearly halfway through 2026. Back in January, many of us sat down together and created goals, intentions, and plans for the year ahead. We thought about what we wanted to build, change, pursue, and become. We mapped out our next draft. So here we are at almos

I have to start with an apology. Last week, I missed you. Life was life-ing, as it does, and I've been living inside a stretch of constant unfamiliarity. That takes something out of you. When everything around you is new, your brain doesn't get to coast. It runs diagnostics all day long. There is no normal setting right now for me, so I am creating little spaces of time that feel comfortable. If you've been feeling it too—the foggy thinking, the shorter fuse, the blank page t

I was at an amazing networking meeting a couple weeks ago, The speaker (a career coach) shared a concept that really resonated with me and I wanted to share it with you. It was called the Johari Window. Imagine it on a grid like this: The OPEN WINDOW Things known by both you and others. This is your visible self. The things you openly share or consistently show. Maybe you know you’re organized. People know you’re organized. You know you’re funny. Other people know you’re funn

Imagine you're faced with a decision, or you're putting yourself out there in a new situation, or you're worried about your performance, or you're in a relationship, or you have a new ache/pain/illness - you get the idea. Does your mind immediately jump to the "what ifs"? What if I make the wrong choice? What if they hate it? What if they take it the wrong way? What if I fall flat on my face? What if something is seriously wrong with me? It's so easy to get stuck in the worst

Not all guilt is created equally. With my close family and friends, I’m a fixer. A peacemaker. I want everyone and everything to be OK at all times. For a long time, I’ve felt like it was my responsibility to make others happy—and when they weren’t, I felt it in my body. A kind of visceral uneasiness, like something is off and it must be my fault. So, I’d look for how to fix it. How to smooth it over. How to put the smile back on their face . . . even if it meant changing mys

Spring arrives a bit chaotically here in Virginia. Those first few days of warm weather have us romanced into the beauty of it. We are outside again after the cold kept us captive. We take long walks, we start planting flowers and cleaning out the winter debris, we frolic! our noses and shoulders get the first sunburn of the season. It feels like we’ve made it. Like the growing season has officially begun. Then bam! A cold front blows in and takes us by surprise. We are all o

Remember last week when we talked about catastrophizing? Another term for it is rumination - that loop where your mind keeps replaying the same worries, analyzing every angle, hoping one more thought will bring peace. We’ve all been there. You have been hearing me (for a long time!) talk about self-talk and mindset as the "cure" for this. I have written many, many emails to you about reframing situations into something helpful and constructive. I have talked and talked about

You know the song . . . the one that goes a little something like this: "It's like raaiiiinnnn on your wedding day" " A traffic jam, when you're already a late" "A free ride, when you've already paid." "It's the good advice, that you just didn't take." Or am I the only Alannis Morisette fan in the group? Please say it isn't so:) So why am I quoting Alannis Morisette other than to harken back to the good old days of the 90s? I want to talk about the difference between a proble

The other day I sent an email and didn’t hear back. A few hours passed . . . then a full day. And just like that, my brain got busy imagining the worst. Maybe they didn’t like the idea. Maybe I said something wrong. Maybe they’re upset with me. Maybe the whole thing is falling apart. By the time I checked my inbox again, I had written an entire dramatic storyline—complete with rejection, disappointment, and future failure. Of course, when they finally replied, it was simple:

Who else is having a hard time believing that March is almost over. We have about ten more days of the first quarter of the year. As we close out this first quarter, it's a natural moment to pause and step back from the day-to-day and look at the bigger picture of your life draft. Not with pressure. Not with judgment. Just with curiosity. Because it's not about getting it perfect, it’s about staying intentional. Three months in, it’s worth asking: Are the goals I set still

This week gave me a very real reminder that rest isn’t just about sleep. I flew home from my trip to Florida just as the spring time change hit. Somehow, in a moment of ambitious optimism, I still thought a 7:00 a.m. Monday Pilates class was a great idea. By Monday afternoon, I felt fine . . . ish. By Tuesday, I felt like my brain was moving through molasses. By Wednesday, I realized something surprising: it was taking me most of the week to recover . Not because anything dr

Before anything else today, pause with me for a moment and ask yourself quietly: What is my best today? Not yesterday’s best. Not someone else’s best. Not the imaginary, pressure-filled version of your best. Just . . . today’s. This question sits at the heart of the fourth agreement: Always Do Your Best. And the more I think about this agreement, the more I realize it’s not a performance standard—it’s a relationship with yourself. It's a quiet checkin to assess your capacity

Today we’re continuing our series on the Four Agreements , stepping into the third agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions. And if there were ever an agreement designed to clear mental clutter and return you to possibility, it’s this one. This one hits us right at our core fears and insecurities. In life drafting, assumptions are like writing plot twists without evidence. We decide what someone meant, why they didn’t respond, what others think of us, or how something will turn out

The second agreement from The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is simple, but powerful: Don’t take anything personally. Here’s how I think about it in real life terms. What other people say or do is almost never really about you—it’s about them : their mood, their past, their fears, their beliefs, their story. When we take things personally, we hand the pen to someone else. Suddenly they’re writing our confidence, our worth, our direction. As we keep layering the agreemen